Teaching my Dog to Walk on Leash Nearly Destroyed Our Relationship.
- Deb Stone
- May 9
- 7 min read
Updated: May 10
Before I was a dog trainer, and before I had learned how to handle my reactive dog Lupin, I spent HOURS trying and failing miserably to perfect a loose leash walk.
Reflecting back now there are so many things I wish I knew and had done differently.
Walks create conflict between dogs and humans.
You see, we are taught that walking our dogs is a necessity, and that taking them regularly is one of the best ways to meet their needs.
We are also taught that a good dog is one who walks next to you and focuses on your every word during their walk. They should be obedient and walk at your side.
The pressure of trying to adhere to these social expectations became a major source of conflict between myself and my dog, and is something I see regularly between humans and dogs.
Dogs just want to be dogs and explore the environment, meanwhile we are instructed to prevent our dogs from pulling on leash, sniffing, walking ahead of us and even walking on grass in some cases.
If I could do one thing for dog guardians it would be to release them of these social expectations.
You do not have to walk your dog at all to adequately meet their needs, and your dog is not a bad or disobedient dog if they don’t walk in heel position.
I can feel the keyboard warriors preparing for battle, but I would urge you to hear me out!
Taking a closer look at the average walk.
The walk is supposed to be about the dog. The intention behind taking our dogs on walks is a good one, but we often get hung up on arbitrary human standards and social expectations to the detriment of the dog. We need to reframe why and how we are walking our dogs to actually consider the needs of the dog.
Let’s consider the function of a walk and why we feel so much pressure to walk our dogs in the first place. We know dogs have dog needs and we know that meeting these needs can reduce the prevalence of problem behaviors.
Taking the dog on a walk through the neighborhood is probably the most common solution that is presented to the average dog guardian as a means to adequately fulfill their dogs needs .... but does it really?
When I have clients come to me wanting help because their daily walk is a nightmare, one of the first questions I ask is:
“do we have to walk the dog at all?”
When we unpack this common problem the solution isn’t what my clients expect because so often it involves halting neighborhood walks all together.
I will say it again:
You do not need to walk your dog to adequately meet their needs!
Dogs don’t need a walk, they need enrichment.
No I don’t just mean giving your dog food puzzles, though these can be great too, and Lupin is certainly a fan!
I am talking about the true meaning of enrichment:
Curating an environment and experiences that provides ample opportunity to engage in species typical behaviors.
Now lets consider a typicall walk through the neighborhood with your dog.
How many species typical behaviors is your dog allowed to engage in when walking through the neighborhood on a 6ft leash and asked to focus only on you? Almost none.
It is not natural for a dog to walk militantly at your side and ignore all that is around them. They can and often do perform this, but I would not call it enrichment. So is the walk actually functioning in the capacity we want?
What about exercise? Isn’t a walk giving the dog exercise? For an activity to truly be exercise, it would need to increase the heart rate. A casual stroll in the neighborhood is not exercise for most dogs, as it barely increases their heart rate. So again, is this really meeting their needs?
When I started out I felt an obligation to walk Lupin every single day, for his benefit! He is a dalmatian, he needs exercise! What actually ended up happening was nothing more than a struggle of wills. It was miserable for both of us.
Lupin simply wanted to do normal dog behaviors, but I felt like I must teach him to walk in heel position and prevent him from excessively sniffing, pulling, or otherwise interacting with the environment around him. I was taught that is what responsible dog owners do. All of my choices were well intentioned, but rarely did they consider Lupin's actual needs.
What I've learned since I started.
What I know now that I didn’t when I started walking my dog is that neighborhoods are one of the most difficult environments to walk a dog in, especially a reactive dog. Not only are neighborhoods and urban areas full of distractions and triggers, we are incredibly limited with where we can allow our dogs to go. Confined to a sidewalk, restricted to a leash, not allowed to set foot in yards that aren’t ours, and bombarded with things like dogs barking at you from behind a fence, children running and playing, other dogs and people out for walks, cars passing by ... .the list goes on!
We are put into a challenging position by taking our dogs for walks in the neighborhood because we have to constantly manage where they go and what they do, with little room for flexibility...at least if we don't want to be a nusance and respect other peoples space and property.
By forcing us to walk in neighborhoods, restricted to a 6 foot leash and not allowed to leave heel position, without adequate training, I actually made Lupin’s reactivity far worse. Furthermore, limiting the way my dog was allowed to interact with the environment did very little to adequately fulfill his biological needs and was a fruitless endeavor.
Ultimately, we got help after at least a year of struggling and we learned better ways of handling the neighborhood walk. Even though we figured things out, I so wished I had been given permission to just stop those walks from the beginning and had been presented with alternatives sooner. I hope I can do that for others by sharing our story and experiences.
A walk designed with the dog in mind!
I rarely take Lupin on neighborhood walks anymore, even though we have the tools and skills we need to walk in the neighborhood. These kinds of walks simply aren’t enjoyable for either of us and are not necessary.
These days I have changed the way I view the walk.
My goal for a walk now is to provide enrichment - adequate opportunities for my dog to engage in species typical behaviors.
What I do differently:
The walk doesn’t need to take place in the neighborhood.
It doesn’t have to be on a 6ft leash or even a leash at all.
It's alwasy in nature and away from busy, urban environments.
The best is private places where I know it's just us, no potential for triggers.
I don’t ask my dog for much anymore beyond the necessities of safe management - maybe a few recalls to keep out of trouble.
I want my dog to sniff, run, roll in grass, dig, chew a stick, heck even bark if that is something that is enriching to them. Additionally, I am not managing my dog beyond what is absolutely necessary to ensure safety and respect of others - there are no heels or obedience unless we need it. My dog gets the maximum amount of agency that I can provide while still keeping him safe and respecting others.
We enjoy finding open spaces in nature with few triggers. I love popping open google maps and just looking for open green spaces nearby that are available to the public. I use a long line if I am using a leash at all but prefer to find safe places where we can go off leash, and I let my dog simply be a dog. Sniffspot is a great tool when looking for dog safe places that you can go off leash.
Not only are these kinds of walks more enjoyable for everyone, they are far more effective at doing what we want them to do - meeting the dogs needs. What’s more, I have found that curating these enjoyable activities for my dog has strengthened our bond with each other. Our walks are no longer filled with conflict and frustration, but instead have become an activity we both look forward to doing together.
We have healed our relationship simply by changing this one piece of our daily routine.
Final thoughts
I am not writing all of this to shame or guilt those who enjoy walking their dog in the neighborhood, or find that to be the most accessible option available to them. The neighborhood walk can certainly be enriching and enjoyable to some dogs and humans. My point is that, the purpose of the walk should consider the needs of the dog and it is ok to abandon the neighborhood walk if it doesn’t make sense for you and your dog.
I also am not saying you shouldn’t teach your dog how to walk in a heel and have manners - those are essential skills that are valuable for many reasons - but do we need the dog to be in a heel for all their walks all the time? In most cases all we need is a dog who doesn’t pull excessively, and who is capable of responding to cues every so often.
The origin of walking the dog was always meant to be about the dog and sharing a mutually enjoyable experience together. It shouldn’t be a frustrating, conflict filled ordeal that only serves to foster resentment between you and your dog.
Let’s find our way back to enjoyable walks with our dogs again.
Comments